Ella - Standing in the eyes of the World

It was 3:15 in the morning and for some reasons I still couldn't sleep. I took off my shirt like i always did before dozing off and sat against the wall on my bed, facing up the windows..the night air that particular moment was just boiling!! I might have been acclimatised by the harsh cold British weather all this time that my body would just repel the slight increase in temperature... yeah whatever!! My brain was just not ready for a critical reasoning after such a sleepless night.. I'm now yet to find the reasons! as this business involves a whole lot of hassle, changing the biological clock!

My mind was floating to the bizarreness of my wildest future and dreams, as far as my sight could take me to the skies through that opened windows.. nothing seemed to be crystal-clear as the night itself might have implied but i didn't seem to realize it even earlier.... The infamous Robert Frost and his "the road not taken" suddenly came up in my mind, but the path to choose that time was not ordinary!.

I found myself facing up the ceiling at some point, forcing out the "higher center" to again figure out the exit plans..but I failed to even draft them after the entire silent night had been consumed...I was just floating wherever my brain took me, reminiscing the good and bad past memories, and when it got too intrusive, I came back to the original plan...

I might have to try again next time...It's alright, i was never a failure!
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and tonight,
at the same spot! but the windows are opened a lot wider to let the night air in and i can see more open starless skies! very PLAIN! My right brain has now taken over the moment, "you've got to prioritize and deal with the current challenges in front of you, do one at a time and forget those conflicting future plans for a while"! I have big exams coming up in 6 weeks time and I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DO WELL this time!! A wise man does not fall twice at the same place, and I don't want my confidence to jeopardize my future again, be humble! and do whatever it takes man!

Looking out the windows again, I'm not lucky enough to find the amazing northern light auroras but I can see some random "robotic fireflies"
on their way to touch the ground.. I now miss home more than ever! and pleaseeeeeeeeeee, I wanna have a good summer!!


Gearing up up upppp!!


~ Sunday 16 May 2010 1 comments